


nearly impossible things

by 27noir



Category: The Thin Veil Series - Jodi McIsaac
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-16
Updated: 2014-07-16
Packaged: 2018-02-08 22:42:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,854
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1958832
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/27noir/pseuds/27noir
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>Derry always managed to surprise him. It was part of why Felix came back time after time. </i>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	nearly impossible things

**Author's Note:**

> Felix and Irial had all of about 2 paragraphs of screen time together and I was already yelling "I SHIP IT" with passion. 
> 
> That's about all the explanation I have.
> 
> Contains spoilers for Among the Unseen.

Irial sat still and showed only the smallest signs of unease under his touch as Felix checked the gancanagh for any lingering signs that the curse still held. But Irial looked more alive than he ever had, his pale skin no longer ashen and tinged with green as it had been only hours ago. His dark hair and darker eyes shone in stark contrast, but it made the Unseen all the more appealing, even to Felix who was not affected by Irial’s influence.

“I think I can say without a doubt that you have completely recovered. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with you,” Felix said, finally removing his hand from Irial’s forehead and giving him a smile.

Irial sighed, and though he seemed relieved, said with a weary tone. “I wouldn’t say nothing. Not that I’m not grateful for all you’ve done,” he added. “And for what Queen Cedar has done, but…” He looked away, running a tense hand through his dark curls.

Felix placed a hand on Irial’s cheek and coaxed him to look back at him.

“That was not your fault. You can’t help who you are.”

Irial’s eyes went big and round, just for a moment, and the light in of the room reflected in obsidian that was held there. Then he sighed wistfully. “You said the same thing to me once. A long time ago.”

After the briefest hesitation, Felix drew back his hand from where it he had let it linger. He turned to the small collection healing paraphernalia he had beside him and tidied them aimlessly.

He wasn’t particularly ashamed by the bit of history he had with Irial. Nor had he forgotten about it. But he was excited at the idea of telling Jane about it. Had Jane not touched Irial, had it been anyone else, Felix suspected Jane would not have batted an eye. Actually she probably thought it was really hot. The woman wrote Harry Potter slash fanfiction for goodness sake.

But there was still a wound from the illusion of love she had had for Irial. And though it grew smaller day by day, Felix could see Jane still carried it.

He was beginning to wonder if she would ever come back to him. He really hoped she would.

“Is the woman… Jane? Is she okay?”

Irial’s inquiry broke Felix from his reverie.

Felix nodded. “She’s fine. She will be.”

“And you? Are you okay?”

Felix looked up at him, surprised at Irial’s concern. Perhaps he shouldn’t have been.

“Yeah,” He said. “I’m okay. It will all be okay.” He gave Irial a genuine smile, and was glad when it was returned.

There was a quiet, easy silence between them, until Felix asked, “Did it get any easier? After…”

Irial chuckled. He leaned his head back against the wall, baring the curves of his neck to the room. “A little,” he said, closing his eyes, a smile playing on his lips. “Just a little.”

 

*

 

Derry always managed to surprise him. It was part of why Felix came back time after time.

This visit’s surprise came in the form of a pale young man with a cocky smile and dark curls. He was eerily beautiful. Indeed, too beautiful to be human. Even curiouser, he appeared to be something that Felix had not seen for hundreds of years and was under the impression that they had died out some time ago.

A _gancanagh._

No one really knew why the incubi had disappeared over the years while their counterparts, the leannán sí, were common enough. Felix had asked one once and the woman had shrugged at him and said without concern, “We lost them.”  Felix had not pressed her for details. It was best not to bother the leannán sí. They often had short tempers and could be quite formidable when angered.

Felix watched the gancanagh from across the festival market with interest and growing concern. It wasn’t good that he was here in such a public place. It would be too easy for any of the woman in the crowd to bump into him by mistake. And that was all it took. One touch of skin. Then a madness that quickly led to death. The gancanagh should know better—

In an instant concern turned to anger when the Unseen started talking—no, _flirting_ — with one of the near by women. Felix abandoned his drink, pushing his way through the maze of people as quickly as he could. This gancanagh did know better, he just didn’t care. And Felix was not going to fucking stand for that.

He got there just in the nick of time. The Unseen was reaching out he pale hand to caress the woman’s cheek when Felix grabbed him roughly by the front of his shirt and dragged him away.

“What the hell—!?” The Unseen said, struggling in Felix’s grasp. But Felix over powered him. He was a skinny thing, Felix realized, now that he had him in hand, and was glaring at him with large dark eyes.

“I should be asking you that,” Felix snarled, shoving him roughly down between the mostly unoccupied alley between the festival stands. “I haven’t seen one of your kind in hundreds of years, but I must have forgotten how utterly wretched you are. You know what you do to them. Yet you do it anyways.”

The Unseen stumbled back, but stopped fighting. Instead he looked at Felix, small and frightened. “What do you mean? My kind? And how do you know—?”

Felix frowned at him. “You don’t know what you are?”

The Unseen stared at him from under his crown of curls and looked lost. “What am I?” he said in a broken, desperate voice.

Felix swore.

Then he sighed heavily and sat down on a nearby barrel. “Do you know what a _gancanagh_ is?” he asked wearily, hoping that they hadn’t fallen out of myth among humans just yet.

The Unseen’s large dark eyes grew larger yet and he stared at Felix for a moment, before looking down at his hands in disbelief, the word moving from myth to fact as the Unseen realized what he was. Felix could see he was shaking but he wasn’t sure yet how much sympathy he felt for the creature in front of him.

“I thought they just… I thought women just liked me,” he said helplessly.

Felix raised an eyebrow at him. “And the fact that they usually ended up dead shortly after?”

The gancanagh paled further, looking stricken. “Do they all…?”

“Without an antidote, yes. And since there are very few people who know how to make it, and fewer still that know any of your kind still exist, I’m going to say chances are pretty high that every woman you’ve been with has succumbed to your particularly nasty breed of magic.”

It was possible Felix was being cruel. The creature didn’t even know what he was. But he must have noticed the trail of death he left in his wake. One would have to have been blind not to. And to have known and to have kept doing it made Felix particularly angry.

“What am I supposed to do?” He asked Felix helplessly, slumped against the back of a one of the stands.

“I’d stay away from humans for a start,” Felix said, getting up. “I’d also try to have a little bit more sense. How could you have not known that you were the cause?”

The Unseen did not look at him, just sat listlessly on the ground.

Felix huffed. “Look, just avoid women from now on okay? If I run into you again and find you’ve haven’t changed your ways, I’m not going to be nearly quite so pleasant.” He turned to leave.

“Wait!”

Felix glanced back.

“You said there were others like me. Where are they? How can I find them?”

“I haven’t seen one of your kind for hundreds years. I didn’t think there were any of you left. If there are more of you, I have no idea where you would find them.”

This was not what the Unseen had hoped to hear as he crumpled further on himself. But Felix left him there, having lost the taste for the festival and for Derry.

 

*

 

It was nearly two years, before Felix gave into his guilt and set out to see if he could find the gancanagh once more.

He was angry with himself, he realized. He had left the Unseen in a state of distress and he regretted it. He might have stopped the incubus from dealing with humans anymore, but if he had it was the result of threats and belittlements and it left the sour taste of shame in Felix’s mouth.

So he was going to try and set it right, if he could.

There were issues, he soon discovered, with trying to find someone who may have tried to disappear. It was harder still if you did not know his name.

He went to Brighid, in the end, to see if she could help.

She chuckled at his request. “I love it when you ask for nearly impossible things.”

“Can you help?”

Brighid smiled at him. “I’ll see what I can find.”

 

*

 

It was already pouring rain when Felix arrived in the area that Brighid had directed him to, and was on the verge of a torrential downpour by the time he spotted a particular crop of rocks jutting out from the moors.

After several months of silence from Brighid, while Felix continued on his own to find any trace of the Unseen, she came with rumors and idle gossip, but it was more than he had so he took it with gratitude. The villages in the area had reported hauntings, a ghost like creature wandering the moors and sometimes slipping through the shadows and alleyways at odd hours of the night. And worse, reports of the death of a young woman who seemed to have just wasted away from hysteria.

Felix approached the small cave that the rocks had created cautiously and ducked in the opening, sure that someone or something lived here at least. He rather hoped at this point that it wasn’t the gancanagh, because it was a rather dismal place to be staying, but pressed a bit further in.

And there he was. Felix waited for the briefest of seconds for the Unseen to notice him, before being filled with a heavy weight of dread. He dropped the bundle he had carried with him and went to the Unseen, who lay lifelessly on the floor.

“Hey!” Felix said, drawing the creature to him, touching his forehead and chest to confirm there was still some life in him. He was cold and thin, but there was life yet. “Come on,” Felix said.

The Unseen’s eyes flickered open and stared at him a bit hazily. He regarded Felix for several moments, clearly confused. “You,” he whispered finally.

“Yeah, me.” Felix said with a small sigh of relief, already at work at healing the Unseen. He was relieved to see that it was nothing too serious, nothing magical or complex.

In fact, the best thing he could do was to get some food into the creature. Thankfully he had thought to bring some with him, and soon the Unseen was sitting up huddled under a blanket by the fire that Felix had revived. He ate a with hesitancy, watching Felix with a dark look.

Felix sighed. He really shouldn’t have been surprised. The Unseen probably blamed him for a lot of things. He was quite justified in that, Felix had to admit.

Which is why he kicked himself when he said, however teasingly, “What were you trying to do, starve yourself to death?”

The Unseen glared at him briefly, then sighed heavily, letting his head fall between his knees. After a moment he sat up a bit kicked a rock with his foot.

“Maybe,” He said, rather defeated. “I don’t know. You try not talking to anyone ever again.” He glared at Felix again. “Why are you here anyway?”

“I came looking for you.”

“Why?”

“Because I felt I was quite a bit of an ass last time, and wanted to try and make it up.”

The Unseen stared at him with an unreadable expression.

Felix watched him with guilt and sadness. “What’s your name?” he asked after a moment.

The Unseen blinked at him, surprised. “Irial,” he said quietly.

“Well then, Irial,” Feix said, shifting to sit beside the creature. “I’m going to tell you what I should have told you nearly 3 years ago: there are others out there. You are one of the Unseen. Your power only works on human women. You have no effect on the Merrow, or the Selkies. You might even make some headway with your female counterparts, but I’ve always found them to be a bit uh… difficult, so delve into that at your own risk. And there are others. The Pixies can be pretty gracious hosts if you don’t piss them off. But you are not alone, and you do not have to spend the rest of your life alone.”

Irial stared at him for a long moment. “I really wish you had told me that 3 year ago.”

“Yeah, sorry about that.” He took Irial’s hand. He seemed startled by the contact, but Felix didn’t let go. “You can’t help who you are, Irial. It is not your fault you are like this. It does not mean you are by any means a creature of evil. It will be your actions that determine that.”

Irial stared at the floor, but held tight to Felix’s hand.

“I’m not saying it won’t be hard,” Felix said softly. “But it’s not worth giving up hope yet.”

At last Irial sighed heavily. He looked Felix in the eyes hesitancy. “So, the Merrow, huh? All these things that I thought were myths.”

Felix chuckled. “They don’t like me that much but they are beautiful in their own right. And if you don’t have any luck with them, there’s always men.”

Felix barely succeeded in containing an eye roll at the look on Irial’s face. Humanity never seemed to have made up their mind about same gendered relationships. Though not exactly common among the Dannan, it had never been an issue.

“I’m just saying, its an option. Come on, have some more food. I’m not leaving until you stop looking like you’re going to collapse again. And maybe until this rain lets up.” He got up and peered out the mouth of the cave where the rain was still coming down hard, before returning to grab more food from his bag.

Irial accepted some more bread and a piece of fruit. “I don’t know your name,” he said after a moment.

Felix smiled at him. “You can call me Felix.” He settled down beside Irial again, and the Unseen smiled at him, just a little and Felix felt he might have done something right at last.

 

*

 

It continued to rain well into the night. They talked through most of it. Irial admitted to being responsible for the death of the girl in the village, and Felix did his best to comfort him. Irial clearly had enough guilt and Felix found no need to place any more on him.

They talked about other things as well. Felix asked Irial about where he grew up and was startled to discover that Irial didn’t remember. Irial shrugged like it didn’t matter. Felix told him about the Merrow and the Selkies and the rest of the Unseen.

“You need to get some rest,” Felix said at last. Irial looked like he was going to protest but then he yawned and his argument was abandoned. 

They settled down and listened to the sound of the rain for a while. Felix thought Irial might have fallen asleep when the Unseen spoke tentatively from near by.

“Hey. Felix?”

Felix opened his eyes. “What is it?”

Irial was curled up defensively, blanket tucked around him and drawn up to his face. Even in the dim light from the smoldering fire, Felix could see the color rising in Irial’s face.

“What’s it like?” Irial asked, his voice heavy with embarrassment.

“What’s what like?”

He pulled the blanket up further, muffling his response, but Felix still heard him.

“Men… What’s it like… to uh…” He trailed off, and now all Felix could see where his dark eyes, wide and a bit startled. “They were never completely out of the question, but it was so easy with women I never…”

Felix smiled a little. “It’s… different. I don’t know. It’s kind of hard to compare it. I think it’s something you need to experience.”

“Oh,” was all Irial said, before curling up into a tighter in the blanket.

Felix sighed. Then he shuffled closer and reached out tentatively, lightly touching Irial’s mussed curls and sharp cheekbones.

 Irial’s eyes flew open again.

“I won’t do anything you don’t want me to— we don’t have to do anything at all — I just…” Felix fumbled, suddenly not quite so sure of what he was doing. He was getting terribly fond of Irial, he knew. This had become more than just an attempt to atone for his previous disregard. “If you wanted someone safe…”

Irial reached out and twinned his long pale fingers in the front of Felix’s shirt, and then shed his blanket, pulling himself to Felix’s chest.

“I haven’t…” he started. “I haven’t had a decent conversation—haven’t been able to share a meal with someone without guilt and fear in over two years. I haven’t had a friend, had anyone who cared for a long time. You’ve paid your penance, Felix. You don’t have to do any more.”

Felix frowned at him, running his thumb over Irial’s cheekbone. Then he sighed, nestling his nose at Irial’s forehead. “Can I kiss you anyway?”

He could feel the heat rise on Irial’s face, but Irial nodded.

Felix kissed him. Irial didn’t resist in the slightest. Instead he pulled himself closer, tucking himself into Felix’s space as Felix’s hands slid around his waist.

Irial let out a laughing, wanting sigh when they broke apart.

“Okay?” Felix asked.

“Very much so,” Irial said a bit breathlessly, shifting to get more comfortable, and Felix realized how cold the thin Unseen in his arms was.

“You’re freezing,” he commented.

“A little,” Irial admitted.

Neither comment on the possible solution to this problem, deciding to act on it instead.

Felix liked the contented noises Irial made when Felix kissed him, and the small sighs that escaped when Felix’s hand’s stroked down his sides, or across the small of his back, or when Felix pulled him closer, as if there was any space between them yet to fill.

And every now and then Felix would softly ask, “Okay?”

When Felix’s hands pushed up the hem of Irial’s shirt and Felix trailed kisses down his pale chest and stomach, Irial breathed “Yes,” in reply, though there was a small hitch in his voice at the end as Felix kissed him softly in small valley of his hip.

When Felix paused, fingers pulling lightly at the laces of Irial’s trousers, Irial swore, slightly frustrated, and pulled Felix down to kiss him. “Yes,” he said into Felix’s mouth, between rough kisses. “Yes.”

And later, when the cold and the rain and all unfamiliarity forgotten, Felix gently made Irial look at him when the only response Felix got out of him was staggered breath.

“Irial,” he said softly, tapping his thumb lightly on the Unseen’s cheek. “Okay?”

Irial blinked up at him, unfocused and flushed.

“Because it’s okay if it isn’t,” Felix said.

Irial frowned at him slightly, reaching up to run his fingers through Felix’s mussed hair.

“Okay,” he whispered. “Okay.”

 

*

 

Irial was sitting at the mouth of the cave when Felix woke the next morning, staring into the thinning fog. There was sunlight coming through and Irial was a lean silhouette in the opening.

He smiled at Felix. “The storm’s passed, I think.” There was a heaviness, or maybe weariness, in Irial’s voice yet, but Felix heard some hope there as well, and he smiled back.

Irial came back to sit near him as Felix broke out some food.

“I meant to ask you,” he said. “What are you?”

“What you mean?” Felix said with a quirk of his eyebrows.

“I mean, you aren’t human, are you? Are you one of the Unseen?”

Felix chuckled. “No. But I’m not human, as you say. My full name is Toirdhealbhach MacDail re Deachai.”

Irial choked on his food. “You’re one of the _Tuatha Dé Danann_?” he sputtered. His dark eyes were wide with alarm. Then, quite suddenly, he flushed deeply. “But we… Ah.”

Felix laughed and reached out to run a hand through Irial’s curls and kiss him slightly on the side of the mouth. “Don’t think about it,” he said. “Or, think about it a lot. I just hope that particular bit of knowledge doesn’t ruin any of it for you.

Irial shook his head at Felix. “Are you kidding?” He swore. “You’re a god,” he said despairingly.

Felix couldn’t help but grin. “Well, then you have some stories to tell, don’t you?”

 

*

 

“Good luck with the Merrow,” Felix said when they parted ways some time later. “I’d come with you but I suspect my presence would do more harm than good.”

“Broken one too many of their hearts?” Irial said in a half tease.

Felix laughed. “No. Just the long running history of distrust between my people and theirs.” When Irial frowned, he asked lightly, “I’m not breaking your heart am I?”

Irial gave him a soft smile. “No. In fact I think you may have put it back together just a little. Thank you.”

 “Take care of yourself, Irial,” Felix said, sudden seriousness.

“I will.” Irial said. “I promise. But promise me something as well? If I ever need saving again, can I come to you?”

Felix frowned. He had not considered what he had done in those terms. There had been selfishness in this excursion, having wanted to put his own soul at ease. But he had forgotten that in the better purpose, the one that should have driven him here in the first place, to help Irial. ‘Saved’ seemed too good a word for him.

“Of course,” Felix said. “Any time.”

“Okay,” said Irial with a smile. He nodded, and turned to go.

Then he turned back sharply, hesitated for the briefest of moments, and then pulled Felix to kiss him.

“Something to remember me by,” Irial said.

“Like I’d forget,” Felix said with a laugh. He kiss the Unseen on the forehead once more. “You’re going to charm the hell out of the Merrow.”

Irial grinned and there was the smallest trace of that cockiness Felix had seen the first time they had met.

Felix watched him head out across the moors for a time before starting off himself. He wasn’t sure where he was headed. But maybe he’d go back to Derry.

 

 

 

 

 


End file.
